That time of year again...

Once a year a plague is visited upon me and that time is again drawing nigh. The first full week of August sees the serene beauty of the Black Hills shattered by a ravenous horde of doctors, lawyers and retirees astride their overpriced Harleys. Yes, I am speaking of the Sturgis Rally, or as I like to call it: Bad-Ass Fantasy Camp.

And what better way to show what a tough guy you are than to have your $15,000 piece of crap Harley shipped to Sturgis while you fly in first class... wouldn't want to get any bugs in your teeth now, would you? And just to make sure everybody knows what a tough guy you are (if they didn't pick up on it by the fact that you're riding a Harley), be sure to cover yourself from head to toe in official Harley brand clothing, because until we saw your Harley headband, Harley T-Shirt, Harley Leather Jacket and Harley Leather Pants, we weren't really sure what kind of bike you owned.

Of course, there are a few actual bad-asses to be found. During the rally last year I was enjoying the buffet at the Kentucky Fried Chicken in Spearfish when a real live Hell's Angel let me have the last Original Recipe drum stick... no doubt he realized that a man eating chicken during the Dormition Fast was someone not to be trifled with.